A song here, let me know what you think

[garetha]

I really liked the
'Sure,but I'm not sure when...'
the first verse line that you changed.It's a really nice repitition.Also the
'You ask.....' bit that you removed from the second verse echos back to the first verse. It give the song a good shape to have the same things echoed.
The entire thing is an excellent lyric
Is it going to be ballady or bluesey?It would make such a good blues song.
Keep it up!

------------------
Peace and Love

[AsIs]

Damn dwim, wish I did music, I really like your song. It is also hell not being able to do music for my own.

I like both verses with the passed out, very different imagry for both, but they both work well.

Passed in the desert sounded almost Eaglesish (I really like some of the Eagles stuff, so I mean that as a compliment) and the passed out in the city had a nice gritty feel.

I am a sucker for road/running away songs. *Thumbs Up* I think it is cool.

------------------
- "How do you know the chosen ones? No greater love hath a man than he lay down his life for his friend. Not for millions, not for glory, not for fame... for one person. In the dark. Where no one will ever know or see." - Sebastion, Babylon 5
- Really I am a woman...honest!
- Oh, and I really like women too
- Resident KiSA (Knight in Shining Armor!)